This is what I learned by tasting a lot of condoms
A few days of excess sex for the sake of science.
When I started thinking about doing a condom tasting, I thought about many things. I wondered what were the qualities that a condom had to have to be better than another, I doubted a little about whether there would be condoms with great differences between them or it would be more a matter of pure marketing and fantasy, and above all I discovered myself as a Pretty basic person as far as condoms are concerned. I did not even remember the last time I bought condoms that were not ON brand. Come on, those of the Mercadona.
ONE Super Studs Ribbed/Studded Lubricated Latex Condoms with Pocket/Travel Case-12 Count (Brass Case)
I started this research, of course, without starting from scratch. According to my experience, I have come to sentence that the Durex are broken - since 3 of the 4 condoms that have been broken in my life were Durex -, that Mercadona's condoms are the best in the world in value for money, and that the free ones are very thick and uncomfortable, but safer than the thin ones.
All the condoms I have tried are latex, but there are also latex-free varieties for allergy sufferers. There are also for vegans, without casein, a derivative of the milk present in many condoms. I based myself to compare them in their typology and not their composition, since I am not vegan or allergic to latex. And here I bring you the inquiries I made, that ( spoiler alert ) have almost nothing to do with the ideas I had before I started.
Condoms of flavors, colors and smell
When you think about tasting, think about flavors and smells right away, so I decided to start with these condoms. And let's see, I'll confess that, honestly, I do not find any grace to eat a cock with fruit flavor. I think that if you like cocks, you should like how they know and how they smell. Call me traditional, but I prefer cocks with a taste of cock or, if I have to use a condom, that has the least possible flavor.
That said, I thought to try all the available flavors to discover which would be the one that, associated with a cock, would give me more disgust. I compared the Durex (which bring strawberry, banana, apple and orange and the box of 12 costs 9.50 €) with the ON mark (which are only strawberry or mint and the box of 6 costs 2 €) and this was I descovered:
Strawberry Durex vs. ON of strawberry
Obligating both, Durex has a more rubbery smell. The Mercadona smell, entirely, like an acidic (and toxic) strawberry gum but still seemed sexier than the plastic sweetness of Durex. Checked this, I put them in my mouth, and Durex surprised me enough. It tastes like sweet strawberry and the aftertaste is quite long lasting. In addition, having a more intense color than the other, is able to dye your pink member and give it more eye-catching. Suddenly I thought of the idea of showing a fuchsia colored cock and telling someone "eat this candy I have for you" and I was amused. That is to say, that the strawberry of Durex seemed to me, in the end, a yes.
ON menthol
As with strawberry, when you smell it, it gives you the impression that you're going to eat chewing gum ... but no. What you're going to eat is a cock with mint-flavored rubber, do not kid yourself.
There is another thing about these condoms with flavors of ON that do not motivate me at all, and that is that the lubricant produces a strange sensation in the mouth, a kind of dentera that lasts a very long time, very unpleasant.
Banana Durex
Let's see, I have a great hostility to everything that tastes or smells like banana, because many years ago I had a terrifying experience with one. And no, it's not the one you're thinking about. I put you in situation: school trip, your mother has prepared a bag with food, this bag includes a banana. Very mature And it goes in your backpack. When you open it at lunchtime you realize that, with the hustle and bustle of the trip, the banana, very, very ripe, has been crushed and has bathed the rest of your lunch. And you are in the ruins of Itálica in Seville, with a lunch in ruins. And very hungry. So you decide to apechugar with it, throw the banana and eat the rest. And after eating banana-flavored bread, banana-flavored potatoes and Russian plantain-flavored steaks, you have to make a two-hour bus ride. In the back. With many curves. You can already imagine the rest.
And well, despite this, here I am with a banana-flavored condom, ready to put it in my mouth. And, honestly and against all odds, it goes and I like it. There were years in my life where I could not even eat a banana-flavored gummy or see a banana peel on the floor without feeling an arch. And I'm still immersed in this thought while I suck on a yellow condom, wondering if maybe this experience could serve as a kind of therapy. After 30 seconds the flavor is gone. I stop fantasizing and move on to the next condom.
Apple Durex
It smells indescribably toxic. If someone presented me with a cock that smelled like that, I could not stand it. It would run very strong, although this person was literally the sexiest on the planet . Despite that, and committed one hundred percent with the cause that brings me here, I put it in my mouth. I can not stand it for two seconds, it gives me an arch. See you later.
Orange Durex
I leave this condom for the final because I have always been very fond of this taste, and I sensed that it would be the one that I would like the most. So it was. It smells like mandarin, super rich, and tastes like an orange flash. In fact, it is a pity that the taste does not last longer, because this, along with the sweet strawberry are my favorites.
But I insist, none of these condoms interests me for a dick. I can not forget the arch, the toxicity and the sensation of the teeth in the mouth. And also, I finish this experiment with super dry lips.
Conclusion: the most productive thing you can do with these condoms is to decorate your birthday party.
Is it better to fuck for free in Madrid, Barcelona or Berlin?
The truth is that I accumulate a lot of experience with free condoms, since the cheap queen theme has been quite my roll forever. In times of monetary shortage but great libido, I've even been one of those who filled their pockets with condoms when I found a bar where they gave them away. Without any kind of modesty. And since I've lived in Berlin, Madrid and Barcelona, I decided to compare the free condoms of these three cities and see which one fucks better. And I also got a surprise.
The free Berlin condom
I always found it quite thick and uncomfortable to put on. Yes, I like the packaging that does not put anything more than the brand, does not advertise to any state agency or indoctrinates you. It is, simply, a free condom. Opening it to remove it from the wrapper is relatively easy, something very important when you are, for example, fucking in the bar where you have taken it. Yes you can. Or failing to fuck with the person you just met in that bar, without thinking "well, if you are so bad about opening a condom, how are you going to use other things ?" These condoms are thicker than normal and standard size, so in a thick cock are difficult to put. But they are free.
Barcelona free condo
To begin with, it is very difficult for me to open it. It's almost impossible. The memory of one time I've had to use my teeth to open one of these comes immediately to mind. With a person almost unknown. Mal. When I open it and put it on, it seems to me, in general terms, the same as Berlin's, but something more uncomfortable. It is not very elastic, so when I stretch it to reach the base of the penis it bounces off, it rolls up again. When you unroll it completely, if you have managed to control the erection, it is already fixed, but in the process you suffer a lot.
Free condom from Madrid
I leave Madrid for the end, and I'm surprised when I open it that it's thinner than the other two and, therefore, more elastic. I put it to him without much difficulty and, although adjunct, he feels more comfortable. It is much better. The most intriguing of all this is that both the Madrid condom and the Barcelona condom are manufactured by the same company, Matrix Condoms, and I expected them to be identical. But no, definitely not. Madrid wins.
I test these condoms with my partner and he also prefers the one in Madrid, even if it's from Barcelona. This is how powerful sex is, capable of making dichotomies dissolve and antagonisms coexist easily. The conclusion I draw from this test is that free fucking has the disadvantage that the pressure - not only the pressure to impress this new lover, but also the pressure of the rubber on your cock - can play a trick on your erection. Another advantage of this thickness is that this way, your fortuitous encounter can last longer, since the sensibility in the cock is smaller.
Mysize the biggest size or how to demystify the thickness of your penis
I had sometimes used XL-size condoms from brands like Durex or Control. One can be cheap queen in times of drought, but also afford luxuries, and above all comfort, in moments of economic tranquility. And of course, the XL of these brands are more my size than normal. That gives you, really, quite calm in terms of the size of your penis with respect to the average. But then come the Mysize empiricism and condoms and you realize that what these brands consider XL, what they want you to believe is XL, is a great deception. A hyperbole Marketing.
Standard condoms measure 53 millimeters wide, and XL brands like Durex or Control measure 57. There is not much difference, but enough to make your male ego feel comforted. Mysize not only offers a wide variety of sizes, but also includes a ruler in its box, so you measure your cock and you stop approximations. So you face the truth. So I, who took the biggest one (69 mm wide) to investigate how big it was, I flipped a lot just by taking it out of the package. And that was more than big, it was immensity. Still I put it on, to see if suddenly all this was an optical illusion ... but no. I found myself in a prophylactic sheet that escaped with the first fiction. Mysize XL, definitely, is not my size .
Continuing with the data and with the demystification, I would like to add that a normal condom has a length of about 20 centimeters, compared to the 22 that is measured by an XL. This means that if someone has told you that your cock measures "about 20 cm", put a condom and do not unroll it all, until the end, until you see the code that-yes-many condoms have printed on the base, is lying.
Peppermint Ecstasy Control, condoms that I bought by name
Sure, you're looking for "special condoms to write an article" to a pharmacy, and suddenly you're there with some called "peppermint ecstasy", and they promise "a pleasant chill that brings the aroma of mint, known aphrodisiac " Of course, the purchases. You buy with great joy And, in addition, the box of 12 costs little more than 6 euros: a chollazo.
And you get home and you do not have anyone to use them at that moment, but you're willing to feel that freshness in your flesh, in your skin. So you put on a porn and you open the condom, which only opens it up and makes you drunk with a breeze of exciting menthol. You put it on, and you discover that that cool breeze has been left in the wrapper. Great disappointment
But of course, you have been completely excited by the marketing and you want to try it in a non-onanist sexual relationship, so as soon as your partner comes from work, you strip him naked and tell him "you have a surprise". And indeed it is a surprise, but not for you, but for him.
According to my partner "it's fun, it's like that really that chill the package talks about is real". It's like "smoking a menthol cigar for your anus". There is nothing. In short, I understand that the pleasure to which they refer from the Control house is designed for the recipient, and that for those who wear the condom the enjoyment is more related to seeing that your partner is having a good time and feels an aphrodisiac freshness in your anus or vagina. In fact, with this condom the sexual relationship itself may not last long, of emotion.
I think these condoms are a great yes, although I would not recommend it for the first few times. The first, better with one of these very thick that you give in some bars for the mere fact of existing.
Retardant and textured ones your cock sleeps and others sting your ass
I was excited when I thought about writing about two types of condoms that had always caught my attention and I had never tried: striates and retardants.
And I looked for retardants for many places, but they were hard for me to find. I remembered then that once a friend told me that he had bought them and had to throw them "because he lost his erection, completely". I was afraid that this type of condom could have fallen into disuse due to this undesirable effect, but based on searching for them through various pharmacies and sex shops, I found the Durex Mutual Climax, and I was thrilled because, in addition, they were striated. Very well. I decided, in addition, to compare them with the textured Mercadona, old acquaintances, to see which one was better.
Mutual Climax
Already reading the box, the illusion of a teenager who uses condoms for the first time he had, began to crack. Because these condoms were designed "to delay his climax" and "accelerate hers". I thought that if your sexual configuration was not him + she could not have much to delay or accelerate. And, unfortunately, that's how it happened.
The striated condoms I tried with my partner and a friend with another person. And we conclude the following:
Your cock is going to sleep, because what these condoms have is a benzocaine-based cream on the tip of the condom. That is to say, the glans sleeps you, but it does not make any effect on the rest of the penis. And of course, in the end you run the same, but you feel less. And above, you stay a few hours with slight stinging in the penis. No, gentlemen, it's not worth it.
Sliding is simply non-existent. Due to the fluted, if what you want is to practice anal sex, this makes the subject fluent, no matter how much lubricant you use.
For the receiving person it is also uncomfortable, making the friction greater but not stimulating at all in the case of anal sex. Unless your source of stimulation is suffering.
As the only favorable point to recognize, is that the Durex I have tried now seem more resistant than those of the early two-thirds with which I got some fright. Three scares to be exact. I understand that they have improved the formula and the Durex that break easily are a thing of the past.
ON striated
I have used these condoms a lot, because they liked a guy I slept with. And of course, for me as an asset they were not very different from the normal ones, but I imagined that for him they were much more cool. I never asked him, but since I have always been a super fan of this Japanese brand that they sell at Mercadona because they are so cheap, they do not squeeze me and I have never broken one.
That is why when we try them, we flip. They hurt, they sting, they are a big no. My friend told me, and I quote verbatim, that "unless the one who puts it on has a very small cock" or who welcomes them in his anus "have a ten lane highway", to feel pleasure with this is impossible. Nothing more to add, your honor.
A fine and safe combination that is not Evax
I tried three types of fine condoms with my partner. The THIN, which we had used many times, some that I found in a sex shop that opened like a package of rolling tobacco and some new ones that showed me in the sex shop, telling me that "it is the first condom that LELO does but It has come off as a motherfucker. "
Thin de rfsu
Rfsu is a Swedish association that advocates for sexual health and, in addition, manufactures condoms and sex toys. The THIN condom is the finest they have, and it is super good quality. What I also like very much is that the rectangular wrapping opens in the middle, which makes it very easy to remove it from there and put it on. And it feels more, much more than with a normal condom. It has been my trust condom for years, and despite being fine and using it for anal sex we have never broken any. They are somewhat more expensive than regular condoms and are only bought in sex shops, but they are worth it.
Slim-Line MI-CRO
What strikes me the most when I open them is that the package is exactly like that of rolling tobacco. And already from the moment I want to separate one from the string: horror. The aluminum that surrounds them is split and, instead of separating a condom, I take one more piece and leave the second condom exposed. I mean, I do not like this container.
When I put the condom on, again I find something nasty. The condom is very thin, yes, but when you unroll it it gets stuck, so I have to take it out again and put it a couple of times. This is what happened to the Durex in the past and that is why I stopped buying them, and in fact I think that was the main reason why they broke up. Once set, everything is correct. The sexual relationship was good and they do not break, but I think that it is not worth the 10 euros that the pack of ten cost me in a sex shop, or as a joke.
HEX de Lelo
I take off the Slim-Line condom in the middle of the dust, and I stand on Lelo's. And, sir, that's a condom. It gives me a lot of anger usually to give the reason to the consultants of stores that they want to sell something to me, and being this a sample that they have given me in the sex shop when buying the Slim-Line, distrusted. But it's that the HEX condom is a revolution. A very crazy revolution. Only in view, it is quite spectacular, because it is created with a union of symmetrical hexagons that form a tessellation. It is very fine, it adapts to perfection and when I penetrate my partner it enters the pull, whole. Super good.
As soon as we finish fucking, I google this magic and what surprises me most of all is that this modern composition, also prevents them from breaking . A ten. When I go back to the sex shop, this is the condom with which I'm going to go home.
Conclusions
As everything good ends, I was left without condoms to try, and from my journey through the prophylactic world I drew several conclusions and a list of winners and losers. One of the main conclusions I got was that it has more importance than the condom that you like to fuck that person a lot and that you know how to give each other pleasure.